A Birth Day 40 Years Ago

Written on Ruxton Island, July 14, 2013 for Jeremy’s birthday July 15

To my dearest baby boy,

40 years ago today I brought you into this world and we were together for just over 36 of those years. We will be together again one day but until then I carry you in my heart. So many memories and so many stories.  When I wake up on Ruxton Island in the loft... oh you would be so pleased with the ladder. It is a work of art ~ Owen poured a lot of love into that ladder and knew that with every swipe of the plane, you were by his side and the words he spoke were for you to hear…  Back to waking up in the loft.   The night sky is just beginning to brighten and the birds chattering wake me before dawn.  I think they know the sun is getting closer and start to sing as the sky lightens and begins to turn shades of red, pink and then into a milky blue and then a full on, sky blue.  And I think the eagles are back nesting high above Nelson’s.  You can hear them.  As my eyes peer into the lightening of day, I have a ritual where I trace the Celtic geometric cloth in my minds eye that hangs over the bed.  Did you?   The leaves and needles flutter in the trees when there is a breeze and sometimes the breeze sneaks through the screen window (yep, the window has a screen on it now) and caresses my face.  I love your loft Jeremy, especially in the early morning and there is not a morning, where ever I am, that you are not in my mind and bring a smile to my face and sometimes the ache sneaks up on me and my cheeks moisten as the tears fall ~ the ache of missing you.

 

 

4 years ago today, a little after the sun rose, we walked down the trail together with Mystic in your arms.  I held your beautiful cat while you got the boat and together we took Mystic to the Vet and there he went to sleep for the last time.  This time as you carried Mystic back up the hill from the beach, tears streaked your face.  Losing your kitty after 17 years broke your heart.

 

 

You created a beautiful resting place for Mystic and a part of you is there too. 

As the day wore on, we kayaked to Valdez and along the rock cliff shores.  A beautiful hot, sunny birthday.  Deep in our thoughts.  Dinner and birthday cake.  Another memory I’ll hold with me forever. 

I can feel your arms around me, you sitting quietly beside me, your breath blowing gently across me, your strength helping me through each day.  I miss you Jeremy Moon today and every day.  You are the stars and the moon that light up the night sky.  You are the sun that leads me through the day.  You make me laugh and you make me cry.  It’s here that I feel closest to you but you will always be with me.

 

 Happy Birthday.  I love you.

 

Owen wrote:  Happy Birthday.  Missing you Magoo.  Thank you for this wonderful place.  We’re doing our best to make it a nice cabin.  Having fun with neighbours.  Keep a place in your heart for us as we do for you.  'til we meet again.