I am sorry it has taken me so long to post photo's of the book that arrived at our house while we were away last winter. It is a book sent to us out of love and I want to share it with my family and friends. And I want each of the contributors to see the completed project. Here is the story of the book:
Days, weeks and months after Jeremy died, I seemed to walk around in a bit of blur. I had to take care of myself and let others take care of me. I was all consumed in my grief. We went away; south, looking for some peace and solace. Returning home was a big step and a difficult one. So many more memories surrounded me and the everyday mundane would once again rear it's head, I would have to struggle through each day.
Our mail had piled up and there on the table sat a box. A regular brown paper covered box. I looked at the return address. It was from my dear friend, Mary in Victoria. Mary, since my illness in August 2007 (which continued to August 2008 when I started to regain my strength) had been sending me cards and presents regularly. They were always full of wonderful surprises. I knew that the box contained just such a gift and with everything else on my mind and having so much to do after being gone so long, I was in no hurry to open it because I knew when I did, I would want to be able to sit quietly and appreciate it. And ofcourse, you know me, I would want to respond, and I wasn't sure I had the energy. So the box sat for a couple of days.
On that day, right after lunch, I decided to open the box. Scissors in hand, I cut open the package. It took a minute for it to register that inside was a book, a collaborative. Being in a circle of artistic friends who are continuely sharing their art by way of collaboration, I knew instantly what it was. And I knew just as quickly that it had everything to do with Jeremy. I was stunned. I sat down, rather heavily and put my head in my hands, and I sobbed. I cried for my loss and cried for the love that surrounded me. I can't explaiin the heaviness that overcame me or the inability to go any further than the first page of the book. Deb Denton's page. I didn't even get the first line read. When I gathered the strength, I pulled the tissue paper over the book, left the book in the box and put it on the dining room table. It sat for four days before I was able to take it out of the box, and it sat for another 4 days before I was able to touch it again. Deb, your page got handled several times in those days. It did not get read... It was over a week before Owen and I sat down together, and together we looked at and read each page, each gift.
After, I looked at the book often and still do. Caressing each page, shedding lots of tears. These women, these artists, put their heart and their love into the following pages, bringing me solice in a time of deep saddness. There is no way to express our thanks. But know that I love you, that I thank you and that I will treasure this keepsake and gift to Jeremy and to Owen and I. AND Ms. Mouat, thank you for your big heart and facilitating this project. You have a huge schedule, one I could not keep up with, and yet you have time to take care of those around you.
I love you all.
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